When To Let Go

Throughout the fall, I have been the project manager for a major renovation in our Victorian home. The porches were falling off our 1889 Grande Dame. As of today, they’re done. Much more solid. Beautifully constructed. Done.

I need to qualify that . . . done, except for the rotten paint job on the decks. The painter hired by our contractor was a little flaky, not too responsible, and delayed too long so the weather got cold and the paint wouldn’t dry. Now we have to wait till spring to have the decks redone properly. That’s the long and the short of it.

What I want to write about is: how do you know when to let go?

Here’s how I know:

When I’ve tried everything I can think of to create resolution, and the situation won’t resolve.
When all signs indicate that pushing isn’t going to resolve it.
When it involves things I can’t control (like weather.)
When I feel my energy flag every time I think about the situation.

Recently a dear friend went to New York City to visit and consider moving back there. I said to him,

“Follow the energy.”

It proved to be exactly what he needed to do. It’s good advice for everything.

Do what you can in any given circumstance, then honestly assess where you are. Things can’t always be resolved when I want them to be. But I can always be resolved when I follow the energy. It’s much less tiresome than pushing, and things get resolved peaceably.

As we approach the ever-stressful holidays, dear one, follow the energy. You will be delighted at how it simplifies your life.

When the weather becomes consistently warm here in Boston, come, say, April or May, we’ll have the porches painted and sealed properly. All is well.