Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Spindoctoring the Self

You know I’ve just made a recording of the first of my Healing Mysteries of Mex Stone called Oklahoma! Hex. It should be in the mail to me even as I write. Yesterday, we spent the day driving to Vermont to meet with a web designer so that I can put the audiobook out into the universe and help people heal themselves by reading it.

Between Sunday and Monday, I received three big NO messages in my life. Yikes!

Here’s the NO spin:

The first one was from the first person I asked for an endorsement of the audiobook. I had been certain he’d say yes.

The second one was from a publisher who’d had my book for months. She did write to me, and I quote, “I think Mex Stone is a winner . . . ,” and then she made a request for rewrites that changes the nature of entire series.

The third one came from one of a pair of people with whom I did a very sticky counseling session last week; she just plain chose not to continue our work together.

What happened to me, through these three no messages, is my real subject here. This is how it went down . . . the inner spin, if you will.

The first one bumped my ego. Ouch! I spent half a day utzy—my skin didn’t fit, if you know what I mean. I had to quit working, take a nap in an attempt to sleep it off which didn’t work, and then I repaired to a novel I really wanted to read which scared the bejesus out of me because it turned out to be about something I truly fear. Argh.

The second one made me smile. I recognized it, you see, as a test of my own desire. I don’t believe the universe tests us—I believe we test ourselves. Do I really want what I say I want? Let’s see . . . my novels don’t fit into publishing pigeonholes. The protagonist is a lesbian and an intuitive. The novels are mysteries. The novels are spiritual. Box? What box? Yes, I really believe there is a reading public for my “cross-genre” writing.

The third one was a laugh out loud. I hadn’t enjoyed my session with these two warring siblings. Neither was yielding in any way and a parent had asked them to see me. The desire for healing hadn’t come from the two needing it. Oh bless them, bless them, bless them. And we think God forgets to take care of us?! Ha!

The YES spin:

I’ll get the endorsements that are mine to get.
The right publisher is on its way to me even now.
A new client called yesterday.

The best place to spin is at home. In all senses of spin.

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