Helper/Helpee

Seeds X, 43

Seed: Helper/Helpee

I quit helping people years ago. Does that surprise you? At the time, it surprised me. I had a client, a dear one, who I’d gone out of my way to help turn on me in rage and resentment. It took me a couple of years to process what happened.

Finally, I got it. I’d helped her and that made me “better than” her in her eyes. My intentions were good, don’t get me wrong, but the way I offered help to her, she felt “less than.” I wrote her an amends letter out of my new understanding.

Helper/Helpee relationships often mean that one person is up, and one person is down. It’s not always a pretty scenario. The thing I learned, and it might shock you, is this: Every situation which involves more than myself must serve both (or all) persons involved.

When I realized that I learn as much from my client as he or she does from me, we are both served. We both grow. We both heal. So, I gave up helping a lot time ago, and instead, walk parallel with people when they ask me to do so.

Be content,

Susan Corso

Dr. Susan Corso

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